Monday, January 23, 2012
I am getting anxious aver the move and all the new changes. I am very excited for all the new things to come, especially this reboot! I wish I could start NOW!! Since I have already started packing up things around the house, I have noticed how little energy I actually have. Eating healthy while trying to move, is not the easiest option either. Just happy to know it is coming soon.
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Never say never..
Never thought I would get this unhealthy. Never though I would stay this unhealthy. Never realized how hard it would be to get truly motivated. Never threw away my "skinny jeans" cause I kept telling myself I could be back in them in no time. Never thought I would be who I am today. Never thought I would be writing this.....but here I am, and thus it begins.
My name is Rachel, and I am a food addict. I have such animosity towards food. I eat things I shouldn't, and definitely in quantities I shouldn't. I am 26 years old, and have gone through so many ups and downs with food, it is ridiculous. How could I ever let something control me like this. If it were a person that had that kind of power over me, I would disassociate myself with them in a heartbeat. I cant very well do that with food, I need to eat. But why do I need to eat? To feel better when I am down? Because I am bored? Because it taste so damn good? Because it is there and I can? No, I need to eat so my body can have the energy it needs to get through the day. If that is the case.. why do I never have energy anymore? Because I am eating for all those wrong reasons and not the real reason. Its time for a change.
The past four years have been rough when it comes to my day to day living. I had a lot of emotional issues I was still dealing with from the past, and had a bit of depression. Totally unmotivated to do anything.I had gained about 60 lbs in a few short months, just didn't realize it had happened till it was all said and done. Sure my clothes didn't fit, and I was sluggish, but I didn't realize I had gained THAT much weight. nothing changed, A year later I found out I had scoliosis, after going to the Dr. when I thought I had a work related injury. I was shocked and upset. I went to physical therapy, it helped a little, but I was still in pain. It took me a long time to accept the fact that this is something I am going to have to deal with forever. Taking pain meds daily was not an option, and steroids made me gain more weight. I found out I was pregnant with Esther, my youngest daughter. That was a tough 10 months. I had severe morning sickness, and by the 7th month, I was in tons of pain in my back and hips. I went to a chiropractor, that helped a lot, but by the last few weeks I was in tons of pain. When I left the hospital I weighed 20lbs less than when I found out I was pregnant. That didn't last long. I had gained it all back in a matter of months. I tried to go on a diet, but it affected my breast milk production, so I went back to eating "normally" instead of trying other options. A few months later, I was in so much pain I went back to the Dr. I found out my bottom 2 vertebrae were touching each other, the weight of carrying a baby around for 10 months had caused them to become crushed. Oh and I have signs of arthritis in my back, knees and other joints. Dr says to loose weight. I join a gym, that doesn't even last a month. I was so motivated, and I enjoyed working out, but other circumstances made it hard to keep up. I then started doing weight watchers.. lost about 15 lbs, then stoped. Money was tight and eating healthy is expensive. Now I am back to were I was to begin with.. 235lbs..and in pain almost daily with no energy whatsoever.
I am sick...I am tired.. I am done..
My family has made a huge life changing decision. My husband is putting in his two week notice tomorrow, and we are moving back home. He is going back to school, and we are reducing a lot of stress in our lives. We will be staying with his parents for about a month till our place is ready. My husband is also overweight. He has been since high school. He is sick, tired, and done as well. After watching the documentary Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead we have both decided to "Reboot". We will start with a juice "feast". Nothing but veggie and fruit juice made fresh daily for 30 days. If all goes will, we ill try for another 30 days. Then it will be a raw diet for a while, then we will go from there. I do NOT want to end back in the same place I am now.. and I will NOT let it happen. For me, my mental and physical health, for my husband and kids.. and to look great of course!
My name is Rachel, and I am a food addict. I have such animosity towards food. I eat things I shouldn't, and definitely in quantities I shouldn't. I am 26 years old, and have gone through so many ups and downs with food, it is ridiculous. How could I ever let something control me like this. If it were a person that had that kind of power over me, I would disassociate myself with them in a heartbeat. I cant very well do that with food, I need to eat. But why do I need to eat? To feel better when I am down? Because I am bored? Because it taste so damn good? Because it is there and I can? No, I need to eat so my body can have the energy it needs to get through the day. If that is the case.. why do I never have energy anymore? Because I am eating for all those wrong reasons and not the real reason. Its time for a change.
The past four years have been rough when it comes to my day to day living. I had a lot of emotional issues I was still dealing with from the past, and had a bit of depression. Totally unmotivated to do anything.I had gained about 60 lbs in a few short months, just didn't realize it had happened till it was all said and done. Sure my clothes didn't fit, and I was sluggish, but I didn't realize I had gained THAT much weight. nothing changed, A year later I found out I had scoliosis, after going to the Dr. when I thought I had a work related injury. I was shocked and upset. I went to physical therapy, it helped a little, but I was still in pain. It took me a long time to accept the fact that this is something I am going to have to deal with forever. Taking pain meds daily was not an option, and steroids made me gain more weight. I found out I was pregnant with Esther, my youngest daughter. That was a tough 10 months. I had severe morning sickness, and by the 7th month, I was in tons of pain in my back and hips. I went to a chiropractor, that helped a lot, but by the last few weeks I was in tons of pain. When I left the hospital I weighed 20lbs less than when I found out I was pregnant. That didn't last long. I had gained it all back in a matter of months. I tried to go on a diet, but it affected my breast milk production, so I went back to eating "normally" instead of trying other options. A few months later, I was in so much pain I went back to the Dr. I found out my bottom 2 vertebrae were touching each other, the weight of carrying a baby around for 10 months had caused them to become crushed. Oh and I have signs of arthritis in my back, knees and other joints. Dr says to loose weight. I join a gym, that doesn't even last a month. I was so motivated, and I enjoyed working out, but other circumstances made it hard to keep up. I then started doing weight watchers.. lost about 15 lbs, then stoped. Money was tight and eating healthy is expensive. Now I am back to were I was to begin with.. 235lbs..and in pain almost daily with no energy whatsoever.
I am sick...I am tired.. I am done..
My family has made a huge life changing decision. My husband is putting in his two week notice tomorrow, and we are moving back home. He is going back to school, and we are reducing a lot of stress in our lives. We will be staying with his parents for about a month till our place is ready. My husband is also overweight. He has been since high school. He is sick, tired, and done as well. After watching the documentary Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead we have both decided to "Reboot". We will start with a juice "feast". Nothing but veggie and fruit juice made fresh daily for 30 days. If all goes will, we ill try for another 30 days. Then it will be a raw diet for a while, then we will go from there. I do NOT want to end back in the same place I am now.. and I will NOT let it happen. For me, my mental and physical health, for my husband and kids.. and to look great of course!
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